The ones who keep it fun, keep it weird, and keep us all training.
Last time, we talked about the negative weirdos—the ones who make you wish martial arts came with a screening process. But today? Today’s a love letter to the good kind of weird. The kind that makes the mats feel like home.
Martial arts attracts people from all walks of life: engineers and artists, moms and misfits, the jacked and the jittery. And tucked among them are the glorious oddballs who make training worth sticking around for.
Here’s to them.
1. The Martial Arts Nerd
This person is pure neurodivergent magic.
They know the biomechanics of a guard pass better than they know how to make eye contact. Ask them about any position, and you’ll get technique breakdowns, lineage history, and maybe a slow-motion YouTube video they annotated themselves. They hyperfixate on specific moves—leg pummeling from butterfly guard for six months straight—and come back with refinements that make your game better, too.
They’re obsessive, precise, and more generous with their knowledge than they are with small talk. But if you train with them long enough, you realize they’re the quiet engine of the gym.
No memes, no ego—just pure curiosity and problem-solving energy.
2. The Old School Veteran with Surprise Moves
They don’t say much. Maybe they stretch in the corner and quietly drink coffee from a thermos that’s seen more belt promotions than you have.
But then, in the middle of a roll, they do something—something sneaky, sharp, and deeply effective—and you realize: this person has forgotten more martial arts techniques than you’ve ever dared to try.
They trained before YouTube. Before “content.” When techniques were written down and memorized by hand, and everyone just learned from the one guy in town who had been to Japan once. And yet, they’ve stayed open. Still training. Still humble. Still occasionally sweeping you off your feet without breaking eye contact.
They’re proof that martial arts doesn’t expire. It deepens. Like a good Scotch.
3. The Asshole Who Isn’t an Asshole
They look scary. They roll hard. Their face says, “I eat new white belts for breakfast.”
But once you train with them? They’re the most respectful partner on the mat.
They don’t talk much. They might never high-five you outside of class. But they feel everything—your tension, your fear, your limits—and they modulate perfectly. One minute, they’re giving you hell. The next, they’re quietly explaining how to defend that armbar better next time.
They don’t need to soften their edges. They sharpen yours. And once you earn their respect, they’ve got your back for life. And if you’re lucky, sometimes you’re surrounded by them…
4. The Memer Philosopher
Half dojo clown, half jiu jitsu therapist.
They’re always sending memes, cracking jokes during warm-ups, and giving your ankle lock a dumb nickname like “The Snap-Crackle-Pop.” But when you’re on the verge of quitting, they know exactly what to say.
They’re the ones reminding you this is supposed to be fun. That sucking at something for a long time is kind of the point. That ego death is part of the art.
Their jokes are surface-level. Their insight? Deep as hell.
5. The Tiny Person Who Destroys Everyone
They’re maybe 110 pounds soaking wet. They look like they belong in the third grade, despite being 38 years old. But they tap out heavyweights as if it were their part-time job.
They’re the best living example of technique over strength. Watching them roll is like watching gravity get rewritten. And somehow, they do it nicely. With a big smile. While asking how your day was.
They’re small. They’re kind. And they will choke you into the shadow realm without messing up their ponytail.
6. The Lifelong White Belt
They’ve been training for 7 years. Still a white belt. Still showing up.
They’re not here for rank. They’re here because this is the one place they feel grounded. They’ve weathered job changes, injuries, breakups, existential crises—and somehow, they still make it to class twice a week.
They don’t need stripes to feel progress. They measure it in quiet wins: escaping side control. Not panicking under mount. Finally getting that one pass they’ve drilled for months.
They’re not flashy. But they’re real. And they remind everyone that consistency matters more than status.
7. The Instructor Who’s Secretly Watching Your Every Move
You think they don’t even know you exist. You assume they’re too busy coaching the athletes, too focused on the killers in the room. They barely look your way during warm-ups, and they never hover during sparring.
And then, mid-class, they casually say:
“You’re still posting your right hand too far when you pass. That’s why you keep getting swept.”
…Wait, what?
You realize they’ve been watching you the whole time. Quietly. Thoughtfully. Clocking your habits, your blind spots, your progress. They’ve just been waiting for the right moment to give you exactly the feedback you needed.
They’re like the Dumbledore of the dojo. Mysterious. Observant. And way more invested in your growth than you realized.
Final Thoughts
If the mats are a jungle, these are the strange and wonderful creatures who make it feel like home.
The good weirdos. The quiet legends. The obsessive nerds and emotionally gifted goofballs. They’re not always loud. They’re not always visible. But they’re always there—holding space, sharing energy, making martial arts feel less like a grind and more like a life.
So if you’re lucky enough to train with one of them? Appreciate them. And maybe become one, too.
Because the best kind of weird is contagious.
The Martial Arts Muse 